The List

(from years ago but still makes me laugh)

From my lil’ sis
 Author Unknown

  1. Accept the fact that some days you’re the pigeon and some days you’re the statue!
  2. Always keep your words soft and sweet just in case you have to eat them.
  3. Drive carefully! It’s not only cars that can be recalled by their Maker.
  4. If you can’t be kind at least have the decency to be vague.
  5. It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.
  6. Never buy a car you can’t push.
  7. Never put both feet in your mouth at the same time because then you won’t have a leg to stand on.
  8. Nobody cares if you can’t dance well.  Just get up and dance!!
  9. Since it’s the early worm that gets eaten by the bird, sleep late.
  10. The second mouse gets the cheese.
  11. When everything’s coming your way – you’re in the wrong lane.
  12. Birthdays are good for you. The more you have the longer you live.
  13. Some mistakes are too much fun to make only once.
  14. We could learn a lot from crayons. Some are sharp and some are dull. Some have weird names and all are different colors but they all live in the same box.
  15. A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour.
  16. Have an awesome day and know that someone has thought about you.
  17. Save the earth…It’s the only planet with chocolate.

18 thoughts on “The List

  1. I am so not a morning person I literally growl my way through several cups of coffee to even be considered human so I am making number 9 all mine Rita!! This made me giggle Loved it xxx

    Like

  2. Oh my, I really really loved these. All of them.
    Some days you’re the pigeon and some days you’re the statue! HA.
    A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour. So fucking true. I LOVE detours.
    And 8 is so fucking George.

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

w

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.